Saturday, October 19, 2013

Scary times

Oliver has had a very rough few days. His breathing is extremely labored and he's been on continuous oxygen since Wednesday. His circulation is poor and at times his hands and feet are ice cold with no capillary refill, a very ominous sign that things are starting to shut down. But right now they're pink and warm, so this symptom comes and goes. It's all very unpredictable, and we all know that he's one heck of a fighter.

He's only opened his eyes a few times in the past couple of days, but he's on a few medicines to increase his comfort, and they make him tired too. We haven't given up hope that he can overcome this, but we're still preparing ourselves for the inevitable and on Thursday his hospice nurse strongly suggested that we don't leave his side.

Chris and I have been sleeping on the floor in his bedroom each night, listening to his labored breathing and dreading each sporadic episode of apnea where he doesn't breathe at all. It's impossible to truly prepare for what we'll have to endure, and it makes it extra heartbreaking thinking about the possibility of him never meeting his little sister. We're living minute by minute right now.

We started him on an antibiotic yesterday, for no particular reason, we don't even know why he's taken such a sharp decline so quickly. We just want to give him the best chance possible. Meanwhile we're keeping him as comfy as possible with nonstop cuddles and kisses.


  1. Oh Ollie, Keep fighting my sweet child. In my prsyers. Such a brave boy.

  2. s o sorry to hear he is not doing well. what ever happens is in gods hands. bless you all

  3. praying for Ollie - - and for both of you

  4. Has any child ever been so loved? You two amaze me each and every time I come to this blog to check on Oliver. You make me want to be a better parent, a better person..... Know that your little boy feels your amazing love for him, and how lucky he is to have the two of you as his parents. I have said this in previous posts, you are two amazing, wonderful, inspiring people. My heart breaks for you both.... but, then I saw that you said Ollie has a sister coming, ahhh.... another precious gift for you to love, as you do Oliver. Praying for Oliver and for both of you and your family.

  5. You do not know me...we will never meet, but I felt compelled to write to you. I found you through a mutual friend on Facebook. As I read your story tonight with tears streaming down my face...Hallelujah by Jeff Buckley came on. Through the sadness and grief I immediately feel for you...I was given some peace for your situation. I know the only thing I can do for you is to pray to the giver of miracles that he has one tucked away for sweet angel Oliver. I pray for your peace, I pray for Oliver's comfort, I pray his baby sister will know him, I pray for everyone in your family to have strength beyond comprehension to help you through this time no one should see have to experience. Please know that you are prayed for by strangers whom you will never meet and your sweet baby boy Oliver has touched my soul.